Dr. Reum’s “A Person/ A Paper/ A Promise” in Stephen Chbosky’s “The Perks of Being a Wallflower”

I first came across this poem in Stephen Chbosky’s The Perks of Being a Wallflower, which is one of my favorite young adult novels of all time. In the novel this poem was signed anonymously, but some of the characters suggested that it was written by a teen who later committed suicide. After researching the origins of the poem, I discovered that it is actually Dr. Earl Reum’s, “A Person/A Paper/ A Promise,” which was written in 1969.  It is rumored that Dr. Reum wrote this poem after one of his students committed suicide. As a result, he became a prominent speaker for the National Association of Workshop Directors, or NAWD, and often used this poem as a tool for teen suicide prevention.

I was in middle school when I first came across this poem. Surprisingly, instead of immediately judging the narrator, I empathized with him. Although the poem uses specific people and events, it was easy to relate to the general sense of anxiety and loss of innocence associated with growing up. Although the narrator leads a “normal” life and no real catastrophe ever befalls upon him, he grapples with a legitimate feeling of pain. This poem is important because it validates the pain felt in everyday life and shows that no one goes untouched.

This poem captures the gradual loss of innocence during the transition from childhood to adolescence. It is separated into four chronological parts that represents the child, pre-teen, and the teenager. The teenager is represented in the final two sections, one where he is completely disenchanted with life, and one where he gives up on life altogether.

The last few lines struck a chord in my heart.

That’s why on the back of a brown paper bag
he tried another poem
And he called it “Absolutely Nothing”
Because that’s what it was really all about
And he gave himself an A
and a slash on each damned wrist
and he hung it on the bathroom door
because this time he didn’t think
he could reach the kitchen.

The ending should come as no surprise, because the poem becomes increasingly bleak as time passes. Now, life means “Absolutely Nothing.”

Reum uses repetition to show how one single person, action, or place changes throughout time. It’s almost as if we are staring at a snapshot photo of each moment across a period of time.

Take the final lines of the first three stanzas as an example:

First stanza: “And his father always tucked him in bed at night / And was always there to do it.”

Second stanza: “And his father never tucked him in bed at night / And his father got mad / when he cried for him to do it.”

Third stanza: “And at three a.m. he tucked himself into bed / his father snoring soundly.”

The repetition is jarring because even though the same scene repeats in each stanza, the sense of love and belonging does not repeat. In fact, this feeling of love and acceptance disappears altogether.

More abstractly, this poem is about isolation, which is relevant when thinking about suicide. During an interview, psychiatrist Barry Garfinkel lists several risk factors for teens who are likely to commit suicide. Two of the factors include:

1) Teens who are isolated

2) Teens who seem to have a chip on their shoulder

The narrator of this poem embodies both of these factors. First of all, the narrator is isolated because he is no longer close to his parents. In the third stanza, the narrator breaks his previous patterns and does not show his mother his poem. Additionally, he tucks himself into bed while his father snores in another room. Even his relationship with his girlfriend seems shallow; she is completely fake, which is symbolised by how much makeup she is wearing, yet he kisses her anyways because that’s what he’s supposed to do.

Secondly, the narrator witnesses events throughout his life that put a chip on his shoulder. For example, he is mocked for believing in Santa Claus, he learns that Father Tracy smoked cigars and left butts on the pews, and he caught his younger sister making out on the back porch. The world, which is already so small and contained to the few repetitious lines we are given, becomes crueler and uglier as the narrator grows up.

Furthermore, Garfinkel states, “We know that the three strongest social correlates of suicidal behavior in youth are family breakdown, a youth’s unemployment, and the decreasing religious observance among the young,” (Garfinkel 290). It is possible that Dr. Reum was aware of these factors to some extent, because at least two of them are present in the poem. These include:

1) Family breakdown

2) Decrease in religious observance

Although it is not the main focus of the piece, the relationship of the narrator’s parents deteriorates over time. In the first stanza, his parents are very much in love. By the third stanza, however, they are not even on speaking terms. The death of Father Tracy signifies the loss of faith, as does the narrator forgetting parts of the Apostle’s Creed.

This poem works as a teen suicide prevention tool, because it addresses the crises people face in everyday life. It shows the causes of suicide in a humanistic and relatable way. Often, suicide is seen as a taboo, a weakness, or a sign of mental illness when in reality it can hit the most “normal” person you know.

I chose this poem, because it is real. It’s my favourite poem, because it reeks of the quiet desperation that a lot of teenagers and young adults can relate to. This poem reveals the silent catastrophe that can befall on everyday life and demonstrates how anyone can be pushed to the edge.

"A Paper/ A Person/ A Promise" by Dr. Earl Reum

Once on a yellow piece of paper with green lines
he wrote a poem
And he called it "Chops"
because that was the name of his dog
And that's what it was all about
And his teacher gave him an A
and a gold star
And his mother hung it on the kitchen door
and read it to his aunts
That was the year Father Tracy
took all the kids to the zoo
And he let them sing on the bus
And his little sister was born
with tiny toenails and no hair
And his mother and father kissed a lot
And the girl around the corner sent him a 
Valentine signed with a row of X's
and he had to ask his father what the X's meant
And his father always tucked him in bed at night
And was always there to do it.

Once on a piece of white paper with blue lines
he wrote a poem
And he called it "Autumn"
because that was the name of the season
And that's what it was all about
And his teacher gave him an A
and asked him to write more clearly
And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door
because of its new paint
and the kids told him
that Father Tracy smoked cigars
And left butts on the pews
And sometimes they would burn holes
That was the year his sister got glasses
with thick lenses and black frames
and the girl around the corner laughed
when he asked her to go see Santa Claus
And the kids told him why
his mother and father kissed a lot
And his father never tucked him in bed at night
And his father got mad
when he cried for him to do it.

Once on a paper torn from his notebook
he wrote a poem
And he called it "Innocence: A Question"
because that was the question about his girl
And that's what it was all about
And his professor gave him an A
and a strange steady look
And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door
because he never showed her
That was the year that Father Tracy died
And he forgot how the end 
of the Apostle's Creed went
And he caught his sister
making out on the back porch
And his mother and father never kissed
or even talked
And the girl around the corner
wore too much makeup
That made him cough when he kissed her
but he kissed her anyway
because that was the thing to do
And at three a.m. he tucked himself into bed
his father snoring soundly.

That's why on the back of a brown paper bag
he tried another poem
And he called it "Absolutely Nothing"
Because that's what it was really all about
And he gave himself an A
and a slash on each damned wrist
and he hung it on the bathroom door
because this time he didn't think
he could reach the kitchen.

Works Cited

Chbosky, Stephen. The Perks Of Being A Wallflower. New York : Pocket Books, 1999. Print.

Garfinkel, Barry, and Jack Frymier. “Understanding and Preventing Teen Suicide: An Interview with Barry Garfinkel.” The Phi Delta Kappan, vol. 70, no. 4, 1988, pp. 290–293.

Snow, Brian. “History of the Poem: “To Santa Claus and Little Sisters”.” History of the Poem: “To Santa Claus and Little Sisters”. N.p., 10 Oct. 2013. Web.